Playing on the edge of an 8 story building..

The summer of 1969, when I was 10 years old, we moved to Kobe, Japan.. We lived on the top floor of an apartment building there.. The higher the floor, the bigger the apartments.. There were only four apartments on the 7th floor.. Plus we were on the end which meant we had windows on two sides.. Chuck was 16 and George was 15.. We used to go up on the roof and goof around.. There was a large area there, with a bunch of clothes lines... It was encased with plastic coated chain-link fencing.. I'm guessing that was to keep the wind from blowing the clothes off the line and off the building, and to keep the birds from roosting on the lines.. Needless to say, climbing on the top of that and flopping around was always a good time.. You could see over the edge of the building from there, and if we bounced too high, getting too close to the edge, you could just drop and latch your fingers into the fence to stop the bounce.. It wasn't long before my brothers came up with this really cool idea of swinging me by my arms and legs.. Not from the top of the cage, just on the roof top.. They would each grab an arm and a leg, and on the count of three they would turn completely around, spinning away from me, which would swing me in a 360 degree circle.. It was a total blast.. They tried every way there was, giving me a different swing every time.. We were like gears, with them spinning one way to get me spinning another way.. If I was on my stomach and they spun away from my feet, I would come back at the ground feet first, face down.. I didn't really care about the ones where I started on my back because quite honestly, they were boring.. My absolute favorite was face down, face first.. It was like doing a back dive that kept going.. Then we got the really great idea of getting as close to the edge of the roof as we could to do the back dive swing.. The roof had about a four foot metal fence around the edges.. I would flop down on my belly, with my feet just a few feet from the fence, and they would do the swing.. COOLEST THING EVER!!!! As I would be coming to the top of the swing, my face was to the sky, and then as I was in the backside of the swing, all I could see was ground, 8 stories below.. It's amazing how much trust I had in my brothers.. I knew they wouldn't let go.. We would do this until their arms got tired and they needed to rest.. It ALWAYS got the attention of the people down on the street.. They would point, gasp, holler, and just pretty much freak out.. We would wave like little circus idiots and do it again.. Stunts like that would eventually be shut down by authorities and our parents would probably be arrested if we tried it in this day and age.. We would also have some video proof of our really awesome trick.. It would absolutely be a YouTube sensation.. It never really occurred to us how insane and potentially dangerous it was.. All I know is that it was a whole lot of fun.. We lived in this building for a year before we moved to Tokyo.. Several months before we moved from Kobe, my mom came in my bedroom one night, acting all sneaky, telling me she needed me to help her with something and that we had to be quiet so we could sneak out of the apartment undetected.. Up to the roof we went.. When we got up there she went over to the side that our bedrooms were on and told me to come look.. I had one of the rooms and the boys shared the other one.. Both of these rooms had big box windows, which meant from the outside, there was a pretty deep ledge.. 12-18 inches at least.. The top of their window was full of alcohol bottles!! So, she told me to climb the fence, slide my legs back through the metal bars so she could tuck them under her arms, brace against the fence for leverage, and let me lean the upper half of my body over the edge so I could get to the bottles.. Now remember, we lived on the 7th floor, and I was on the roof above.. I was able to just reach the top of the bottles, and as I soon as I would grab one, I would twist and raise just enough to slide the bottles on the roof beside my mom.. I don't remember how many we wound up with but I remember both of us giggling like crazy at what we were doing.. She kept saying she wished she could be a fly on the wall when they finally got ready to sneak off with their stash, and it wasn't there!! I'm not sure why it didn't occur to me to be scared to death when I bellied over the edge of that building.. Yes, my mother dangled me over the edge of a fairly tall building.. When I was ten years old.. No wonder I was such a little daredevil growing up.. I was always being put up to doing something.. As unbelievable as this story may sound, I assure you it's all true.. My brothers and my mom are still around to vouch for me.. Anybody that has ever had the opportunity to be around us at a BBQ or some other gathering has already heard all of this.. I can't help but beam like a Gold Medalist when they tell our story to somebody.. Especially someone that has already heard it from me.. They usually have this look of total disbelief, and amazement, at the fact that I wasn't exaggerating one bit.. Yep, it's official, my family is CRAZY.. And to think I ever wonder how I got this way!! Haha!!

I Pray You Enough (Found this in an email)

She began to smile. 'That's a prayer that has been handed down from other generations. My parents used to say it to everyone.' She paused a moment and looked up as if trying to remember it in detail, and she smiled even more. 'When we said, 'I pray you enough,' we wanted the other person to have a life filled with just enough good things to sustain them.'

Then, turning toward me, she shared the following as if she were reciting it from memory.

I pray you enough sun to keep your attitude bright no matter how gray the day may appear.

I pray you enough rain to appreciate the sun even more.

I pray you enough happiness to keep your spirit alive and everlasting.

I pray you enough pain so that even the smallest of joys in life may appear bigger.

I pray you enough gain to satisfy your wanting.

I pray you enough loss to appreciate all that you possess.

I pray you enough hellos to get you through the final good-bye.

Then, she began to cry, and walked away.

They say, it takes a minute to find a special person, an hour to appreciate them, a day to love them, but an entire life to forget them....

TAKE TIME TO LIVE.....

To all my friends and loved ones,
I PRAY YOU ENOUGH...... .

Childbirth with Missy...My style... (Yes, I was pretty STOOPID)

             Childbirth with Missy...My style... (Yes, I was pretty STOOPID)
Being pregnant was amazing, after I got done being sick.. I was totally fascinated with my belly and would watch the baby, rolling around and kicking, for hours on end.. I loved my fat little tummy.. I used to be incredibly impatient and as the weeks turned into months, I was ready to have my baby already.. Well, we all know you can't rush Mother Nature.. But then again, Mother Nature had never met me.. I never knew whether I was having a boy or girl until the Dr held the baby up and said, "You have a girl!".. With Missy, I was 3 1/2 weeks away from my due date when Dr Robinson informs me that I am only a few days away from going into labor.. Are you kidding me?? I was actually just days away from being a mommy?? Well, by all means lets get this show on the road.. With his warning to not waste a second if I thought there was any chance I was in labor, I went home.. Home was on the Douglas/Taney County line on Hwy 76.. If you are familiar at all with the area, you know how very far away I was from Springfield.. That was on Friday.. By Monday, I had waited nicely as long as I was going to.. So, I'm thinking that since I "understood" the dynamics of a pregnancy, that a soft jolt wouldn't hurt me or the baby.. (I can't believe I'm putting this out there for the world to read..) Anyway, I stood in the doorway of the bedroom, took a couple of long strides and launched myself like a rocket onto the bed.. It was a fairly easy launch and a pretty soft landing on my backside.. I bounced fairly gently, got up, and did it yet again.. One more time for luck and I settled down for the night.. Fast forward to Tuesday afternoon on June 19th, 1979.. By lunch I'm noticing that my little tummy ache has a distinct pattern to it.. Like every 40 minutes.. I was sure I had plenty of time, if it was in fact labor, but I called my Dr just to make sure.. He tells me to get my butt up there.. RIGHT NOW!! That's hard to do when you are your only ride.. Haying and milking put me at the bottom of the importance list and I was on my own for just an hour maybe.. I mean my pains were pretty far apart.. I had plenty of time.. So, as I wait for Missy's dad to get home from work I decide to clean off the front seat so we could leave immediately.. As I leaned in the window of my car to get my keys, all hell broke loose.. I was talking to my mother-in-law as I was standing there and I just yelped.. My water had broken and I was immediately launched into hard labor.. By that, I mean that my pains were maybe 30-45 seconds apart at the most.. Even as I stood there with water puddling on the sidewalk, it still didn't make sense that this baby was going to be in that big of a hurry.. Wrong answer!! To be fair, we both thought I still had plenty of time and we knew that Missy's dad would be there very soon to take me.. She did not mean it the way it may have sounded, and when she said, "You picked a fine time to go into labor.", I totally understood what she meant.. The timing could not have been any worse.. If you have ever been on a dairy farm you understand how critical milking on time is.. If she had taken me, the cows would have been hours late being milked.. That can devastate a healthy herd for a while in a lot of very different ways.. So, she would run down to the barn, try to get the cows ready, then run back to the house to check on me.. She is not the bad guy here.. Just part of the story.. She never dreamed that this baby was not going to wait 30 minutes.. It didn't take very many minutes before I knew I didn't have that kind of time.. On her second trip back to the house I told her I had called my Aunt June, who lived about 20 minutes away, and that she was on her way to get me.. LaQuita loaded me in the truck and like a NASCAR racer (I'm not kidding one bit!) she flew up the hwy to meet her and pass me off.. Then the race was really on down 76 Hwy, headed toward GoodHope and Springfield.. We never even made it through GoodHope.. She stopped at a country store to call an ambulance.. Well, now we have to head toward Ava to meet them.. Halfway to Ava we meet up and I bailed out of her car, onto the cot, and we were off again.. Lights and sirens blaring, a detour to Mansfield, and a baby trying to be born in the back of that ambulance made for some very surreal moments.. All I can remember, aside from the absolute fear and unimaginable pain, is the massive chest on the lady taking care of me in the back.. All joking aside, she held me tight through every second of every pain, and I felt safe nestled in her breasts.. To this day, a hug from a big chested woman brings comfort.. Weird I know.. By now it has been almost two hours of this, and I have managed to NOT push, even though I was crowning.. I was too afraid to and determined to make it to the hospital....any hospital.. A flurry of activity was under way, and the instant they got me inside at Mansfield Tri-County, they were telling me to push.. I was telling them that one of my stirrups kept collapsing which they didn't seem to care much about.. It was kind of making me mad.. 20 minutes later, still fussing through relentless pain about the stirrup, I was told to push or have a C-section.. My choice.. A scare tactic that worked well.. Three pushes later and I watched as they turned the baby around to see what we had.. I had a girl!!! I actually had a girl!! I also had every family member waiting in Springfield for us to arrive.. Obviously that didn't happen.. My actions probably contributed to the scariest few hours of my life.. Not to mention how incredibly stupid they were.. And I wonder why Missy is so impatient.... DUH!!

I Believe... Author Unknown

I Believe... (Don't know who wrote this but I love it!!)

I Believe...
A Birth Certificate shows that we were born.

I Believe...
A Death Certificate shows that we died.

I Believe...
Pictures show that we lived!

I Believe...
That just because two people argue, it doesn't mean they don't love
each other. And just because they don't argue, it doesn't mean they do love
each other.

I Believe...
That we don't have to change friends if We understand that friends
change.

I Believe...
That no matter how good a friend is, they're going to hurt you every
once in a while and you must forgive them for that.

I Believe...
That you can do something in an instant that will give you heartache for
life.

I Believe...
That it's taking me a long time to become the person I want to be.

I Believe...
That you should always leave loved ones with loving words. It may be the
last time you see them.

I Believe...
That you can keep going long after you think you can't.

I Believe...
That we are responsible for what we do, no matter how we feel.

I Believe...
That either you control your attitude or it controls you.

I Believe...
That heroes are the people who do what has to be done when it needs to
be done, regardless of the consequences.

I Believe...
That money is a lousy way of keeping score.

I Believe...
That my best friend and I, can do anything, or nothing and have the best time.

I Believe...
That sometimes the people you expect to kick you when you're down, will be the ones to help you get back up.

I Believe...
That sometimes when I'm angry I have the right to be angry, but that
doesn't give me the right to be cruel.

I Believe...
That maturity has more to do with what types of experiences you've had
and what you've learned from them and less to do with how many birthdays
you've celebrated.

I Believe...
That it isn't always enough, to be forgiven by others. Sometimes, you
have to learn to forgive yourself.

I Believe...
That no matter how bad your heart is broken the world doesn't stop for
your grief.

I Believe...
That our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, But, we are responsible for who we become.

I Believe...
That you shouldn't be so eager to find out a secret. It could change
your life Forever.

I Believe...
Two people can look at the exact same thing and see something totally
different.

I Believe...
That your life can be changed in a matter of hours by people who don't
even know you.

I Believe...
That even when you think you have no more to give, when
A friend cries out to you - you will find the strength to help.

I Believe...
That credentials on the wall do not make you a decent human being.

I Believe...
That the people you care about most in life are taken from you too soon.

I Believe...
That you should send this to all of the people that you believe in, I
just did.

The happiest of people don't necessarily have the best of everything..
They just make the most of everything.

Thank you God for all the wonderful people who help us throughout the
journey of life.

The 45 lessons life taught me.. By Regina Brett

The 45 lessons life taught me...

This is something we should all read at least once a week!
Written By Regina Brett, 90 years old, of The Plain Dealer, Cleveland , Ohio

To celebrate growing older, I once wrote the 45 lessons life taught me.
It is the most requested column I've ever written. My odometer rolled over to
90 in August, so here is the column once more:

1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.

2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.

3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.

4. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick.
Your friends and parents will. Stay in touch.

5. Pay off your credit cards every month.

6. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.

7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.

8.. It's OK to get angry with God. He can take it.

9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.

10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.

11. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.

12. It's OK to let your children see you cry.

13. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.

14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it.

15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don't worry; God never blinks.

16. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.

17. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.

18. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.

19. It's never too late to have a happy childhood.
But the second one is up to you and no one else.

20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer.

21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie.
Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is special.

22. Over prepare, then go with the flow.

23. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple.

24. The most important sex organ is the brain.

25 No one is in charge of your happiness but you.

26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words 'In five years, will this matter?'

27 Always choose life.

28. Forgive everyone everything.

29. What other people think of you is none of your business.

30. Time heals almost everything. Give time time.

31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.

32. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.

33. Believe in miracles.

34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn't do.

35. Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.

36. Growing old beats the alternative -- dying young.

37. Your children get only one childhood.

38. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.

39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.

40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's, we'd grab ours back.

41. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.

42. The best is yet to come.

43. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.

44.. Yield.

45. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift.



Friends are the family that we choose for ourselves.

Tequila and Salt (Don't know the author)

This should probably be taped
to your bathroom mirror
where one could read it every day.
You may not realize it,
but it's 100% true.


1. There are at least two people in this world
that you would die for.


2. At least 15 people in this world
love you in some way.


3. The only reason anyone would ever hate you
is because they want to
be just like you.


4. A smile from you can bring happiness to anyone,
even if they don't
like you.


5.. Every night,
SOMEONE thinks about you
before they go to sleep.


6. You mean the world to someone.


7. You are special and unique.


8. Someone that you don't even know exists loves you.


9. When you make the biggest mistake ever,
something good comes from it.


10. When you think the world
has turned its back on you
take another look.


11 Always remember the compliments you received.
Forget about the rude remarks.


And always remember....
when life hands you Lemons,
ask for Tequila and Salt and call me over!


Good friends are like stars........
You don't always see them,
But you know they are always there.


"Whenever God Closes One Door He Always Opens Another, Even Though
Sometimes It's Hell in the Hallway"


I would rather have one rose and a kind word
from a friend while I'm here
than a whole truck load when I'm gone.

Happiness keeps You Sweet,
Trials keep You Strong,
Sorrows keep You Human,
Failures keeps You Humble,
Success keeps You Glowing,
But Only
God keeps You Going

'Worry looks around, sorry looks back, Faith looks up.'

Kimberlee Diann

Again, wow... Where do I even start?? Five weeks early, yet healthy.. Very difficult delivery for me.. Emergency C-Section brought you into this world.. It took me four days to name you.. You ended up being named after me, Grandma Jo, and Grandpa Spicer.. Complications made me very sick and kept us in the hospital for 18 days.. Probably some of the darkest days of my life defined your first year or two.. You were an amazing baby.. Just beautiful and so easy to take care of.. THANK GOD for my family.. You were surrounded by so much love.. I've spent years beating myself up over the guilt of not wanting to even have to be bothered with taking care of you.. I did what I had to and I had my moments of pure enjoyment at being a mommy.. Then the clouds would roll in and the darkness would take back over.. I understand now and forgiveness of my own mistakes still eludes me from time to time.. A very difficult delivery compiled with a major upheaval of our lives when you were five weeks old, were exactly the ingredients needed for a major postpartum depression.. How very heartbreaking that there wasn't a lot of support, or even recognition, of this very debilitating condition.. I had no idea what was wrong with me.. It took reading, "Down Came the Rain", by Brooke Shields, a few years ago before I could even accept that I wasn't a horrible person for how detached I had felt.. I experienced almost exactly the feelings she described, and finally, the healing has begun.. You were easily the best natured of the girls, well, until you hit about four years old.. It was then that you became known as Satan.. It was used lovingly, but it was a nickname none-the-less.. Away from home, you were absolutely everybody's favorite out of you three girls.. At home, you flourished on your ability to create chaos.. We could see it in your eyes when you were about to start stirring things up.. You were a feisty little thing and every single boy in the neighborhood was very afraid of you.. The fact that you could send them running over the hill for their lives, when all you had with you was a whiffle-ball bat, is testament to that.. It was also the reason they challenged you on a daily basis.. The words, "Bet you can't" or "I dare you!!" were all it took to get you to prove them wrong.. You were a daredevil anyway, but that just clinched the deal.. At Six Flags, when you were six, you stood on the front of my feet, just so you could be tall enough when they came around with the yardstick, to ride the roller coaster.. You screamed "NOOOO!!!!" the entire time, yet as soon as the ride was over you were ready to go again.. Matt Burns challenged you to a race on your bikes, down our hill, which you happily obliged.. You were winning, and looking back to make sure.. As soon as you turned back around you slammed into the back of the Waggoner's truck parked in the street.. The trip to the ER told us what we already knew.. Your nose was broken.. Then, right on the heels of that incident you accepted yet another challenge from Matt.. He bet you that you were too chicken to jump off the rails of his deck, over the bushes, to the ground below.. Which, being on the hill we lived on, was probably about a 10 ft fall.. Pffftttt!! Piece of cake.. That trip to the ER revealed a broken arm.. I think you might have been the one that put Missy and Matt on the skateboard (sitting) and sent them down the our driveway.. That trip to the ER revealed a severely sprained neck for her.. Stephanie swears you were the organizer of the events that resulted in her being locked in the bathroom, requiring her being rescued by Aunt Debbie.. You started you career at the ER when you were three, racing Brigette Hodges around their earth-home, and while looking back to make sure you were winning, you bit the dust.. That trip revealed a broken leg.. Those trips also put me under fire by hospital authorities, questioning your injuries.. The questions were put to rest when I allowed the witnesses/partners in crime to tell their version of the story.. You could not say your R's until fifth grade, and this blog would not be complete without quoting our all time favorite saying from you.. "Andy Pee-tohs.. I want a divohse!!" ("Andy Peters.. I want a divorce!!") That was in second grade.. When you were 13, you and Steven McKnabb started going steady.. That went back and forth for the next few years.. Even when you two weren't "together" he was always at the house, hanging out with everyone else.. He was so crazy about you that he gave up some very destructive behaviors.. His family credits his love for you as the reason they got their son back.. Then two weeks after his 16th birthday, on June 22, 1998, he was killed, trying to save his beautiful Canary Yellow '69 Firebird after it popped out of gear.. We all lost a very big part of our innocence that day when tragedy got right in our faces.. It "rained" on my cheeks for probably a year constantly.. I'm not sure how, because it wasn't any particular thing, but you changed as a result of that loss.. You were still a turd, could still create a commotion on a whim, but the really raw edge was gone.. You were, in fact, softer somehow.. Then three years later along comes Steven Robert, whom you named in honor of him.. You are the only child of mine to follow the motherhood path at this time.. The other two will eventually bless me with a few more grandbabies.. But for now, Steven and Emberlynn are more than enough.. Steph and I were just talking about how you have had her babies, and wondered which of her two sister's babies she would have.. Her first thought was probably Missy's and that they would be crybabies.. Then I said, "Or, you might have Kim's, since she had yours.." The few seconds of silence, followed by the gasp on the other end of the phone were priceless.. I'm still laughing at her.. That response pretty much sums you up.. You stand up for what you believe in, which I admire immensely, and I laughingly tell people you would fight a buzz saw running backwards.. The funniest part about that statement, is that I am not kidding!!

From Kim...

Kimberlee Dalton Hull

April 23

After an hour on the phone with my Momma I learned 2 things.... 1-it is ok to cry over a story you read the night beforehand and 2 that you can then laugh at the silliest things all in one conversation .... Oh the late night talks with that silly goon ... :) Love you so much Momma. — with Susan Spicer Mason.

Kimberlee Dalton Hullposted toSusan Spicer Mason

July 19, 2012

Hey Mom..... you say "yes sweetheart " I say "hey ya know your the best, thank for always being there, for wiping my tears, for kissing my BooBoos lord knows I had severel. :) for holding my hand when I was scared and for pushing me when I didnt think I had any thing left. Thanks for always comming at the drop of a hat, rather its to get the kids or to come sit in silence cause I had a rough day, or getting a 2 am phone call just cause i needed to talk you never say Im tired or I was asleep you talk for hours if thats what i needed" I LOVE YOU MOMMY. THANK YOU FOR NEVER LOOSING FAITH IN ME OR REMINDING ME HOW STRONG I AM. Just thought u needed to know that. Love you.

Susan Spicer Mason

November 14, 2011 via mobile

Kisses from angels... Missy called tonight so her and Eric could pray with us for Kim.. Kim was in the tub so I put them on speakerphone, sat on the toilet next to the tub, and we bowed our heads as Eric started the prayer.. Missy finished it and we said Amen.. Kim and I raised our heads to look at each other and we were both bawling, which made us both start laughing.. Thank you Missy and Eric for the overwhelming peace your prayers brought.. We love you so much.. Kim has never had such an audience taking a bath!! I am so blessed.. Please, everybody, pray for my baby tomorrow.. I love you all SOOOOO much!! :)

Kim posted this... Too wonderful not to share.. I am so blessed... TISSUE ALERT!!!

by Susan Spicer Mason (Notes) on Friday, July 29, 2011 at 2:01pm

PublicFriendsOnly MeCustomClose FriendsFamilySee all lists...Wagoner, Oklahoma AreaBradleyvilleAcquaintancesGo Back

Pay it Forward

by Kimberlee Dalton Hull on Friday, July 29, 2011 at 1:24pm

So I'm in Casey's in Ozark which use to be Quick Trip, getting a drink and candy bar and the old man in front of me is so confused on why he cant use his QT card to get gas anymore, he tells the clerk that's all he has besides 5 dollars and that wont get him to his wife at Cox and back home, so with a store full of people I start sobbing when he starts to tell his wife's condition and she probably wont make it much longer, so he says guess I wont get to see her today and walks out, I put my stuff down and told the clerk to put 40.00 dollars on that pump and I will take care of it, so she does and I walk out to him and tell him to get his gas that someone took care of it, he looked at me and said "my sweet dear you need to keep your money you probably have a family at home" I said yes sir I do and I promise they will be glad I did this, he said please give me your address so I can mail your money back and I refused told him to remember me if he ever saw me on the side of road, then he teared up and said I will never forget you young one, you are truly an angel and now I can see my love today.... Tear Tear cant stop crying. As he was leaving he had a sticker on back glass that said retired Navy, its so sad to me that the very people who got us here today cant even get gas and struggle like they do, I don't know why I was there today but I believe God put me there to help, and when all the others in the very packed store were so frustrated I told all of them right there you all ought to be ashamed at yourselves for being so mad over something so sad, they probably thought I was crazy because as I'm telling them that I am bawling. The women behind me looks at me and had the nerve to say "I work to hard for my money, your crazy for doing that" I didn't even has a response to that surprising I know. Will I ever see him again probably not, but will I ever forget him no I wont he touched my heart so deep and I really don't know who helped who today. God Bless all our troops.

Stephanie Lynn..

So, my original plan was to go down the list and talk about Kim next.. After much grief from Stephanie for blogging about Missy first, I have decided to blog about Steph next.. Gosh, again, where do I begin?? She was the surprise baby.. I cried so hard at the hospital when I found out I was pregnant, and did not have food poisoning, that they had to sedate me.. I just couldn't imagine how I would cope with three little ones.. Dumbest thought ever, I know, but I was young and did not give enough credit to myself.. By the next morning, I was right with the world again, and began to feel the excitement creep in.. Did I dare hope for another girl?? I had already brought two of them into this world, into a family overrun by boys.. For the girls' dad, I would have been just fine with a boy.. If I was calling the shots, it would be another girl.. Well, she started her journey to becoming a tiny little human off with a bang.. I landed in the hospital for six days with her.. As my belly grew (very little), so did my discomfort.. How could such a little baby be causing so much pain?? Just under my right ribcage was always burning and I could no longer sleep on my side.. Ultrasound showed a breach baby, tucked squarely under the right ribs, facing frontward.. Her head was causing all the trouble.. Very interesting pregnancy, with much action, but that's another story.. She bleated like a weak little lamb, instead of actually crying, for about the first 8 weeks of her life.. She had the weirdest head when she was born.. You could see every ridge of every bone.. I kept bonnets on her.. And, she looked exactly like a little old man!! We were in love with her from the get-go.. She was the only baby I have ever seen that did not stay bunched up sleeping for the first month or so.. She sprawled out completely in her bassinet.. To this day, she takes up every inch of bed, in every direction.. I was so ready to sit and rock her and was content just holding her.. Not near as uptight as I had been with the other two.. I was sad for the other two girls that I had not enjoyed every second of taking care of them like I did her.. She displayed her own little unique personality very quickly.. Stubborn doesn't even begin to define her.. She never walked on her whole foot until she was probably 6 or 7.. She was our twinkle toe munchkin.. She did all her walking on the balls of her feet.. Once she was old enough to peek over the kitchen cabinet, she would put her nose and her fingers on the edge, and very soon I would see her toes feeling their way along the edge too.. She called mushrooms fungus when ordering them for her pizza until she was around four.. I was determined to encourage her to eat things I wouldn't touch, so when I pretended to be loving them, I would say, "Oh yummy fungus Steph!!" and she would eat them.. Loves them to this day.. Ewww.. By the time she was two, one of her favorite foods was chef salad with creamy Italian dressing.. Her and I would eat it at 6am.. She fell in love with hard boiled eggs that Easter.. A day or two after, I kept hearing this funny noise coming from the kitchen and peered around the corner, only to find her patiently breaking every single egg in the fridge.. She wanted another hard boiled egg and was sure if she kept breaking, one of them would surely be solid.. I cleaned up a dozen cracked eggs off the floor that day.. Then had to go buy more so I could boil her the eggs she was wanting and wanting them now.. You could not dictate her style of dress.. She has asked me how I could dress her the way I did sometimes.. That's hilarious because she was going to dress her way or not at all.. I came up the hill in Ozark once and she was playing on the driveway with the other kids.. She had on a black snow boot with a fuzzy top, a brown sandal with a purple sock, a green pair of shorts and a red shirt.. She had a yellow bow in her hair.. Priceless.. She was the EASIEST child to get to sleep.. Put her in her highchair, give her food, and wait till she passed out.. Clean her up and put her to bed.. The days she didn't fall asleep like that she would climb in my lap like a little monkey does to it's momma, snuggle down into me, and be out.. She would go stick her nose in a corner or put her face to a wall if you made her mad.. That was how she pouted.. She came down the stairs in Ozark once, barefooted and carrying a teddybear.. She informed me she was mad at me and running away.. When I asked her where she was running to, she matter-of-factly told me "Oklahoma".. Still have no idea where that came from.. She would play with roly-polys (potatoe bugs) and I was watching her one day.. She would flip it so it would roll up in a ball.. Then she would chase it down and do the same thing all over again.. Then, out of nowhere, she would open her hand and smack the bug on the sidewalk, squishing it.. I asked her why she did that and she matter-of-factly told me because she was done playing with it.. Duh!! Her nicknames from me were Stephanie Monster Mash, Stephanie Duder Magruder, and Stephanie Monkey Face.. I did not know any Magruders but it rhymed with Duder.. Then in 2004 she married Richard Magruder.. Way cool.. Her nickname with everybody else quickly became "Baby Satan".. Or "Satan II".. Kim was "Satan I" or just "Satan".. It actually took me four days to give her the name she has now.. While I was carrying her, she was to be "Megan Lynn" if I had a girl.. Then, she looked nothing like a Megan so the hunt for her name began.. On day three we settled on "Stacie Lynn" and the nurses were so proud that she finally had a name.. Obviously I changed my mind one more time.. We took a year off school for her eighth grade year and faked home school.. We played around with it but there was really no daily structure.. We were both rebelling against people we didn't respect and decided we would do this the way we wanted.. I'm guessing my four year old self was involved in that.. :) She started her Freshman year at Spokane and hated it for the first weeks of school.. I cried everyday because she would come home so unhappy.. Then she started making friends.. Lots and lots of them.. The kids loved her, the teachers loved her, the parents loved her.. She took up for the underdog and made sure to let them know she was their friend.. She said she knew if she didn't, that I would cry for days over the thought that somebody felt alone.. She tried out for, and made, the cheerleading squad.. She was a natural at it and loved it.. Her Sophmore year, she won the Miss Merry Christmas Crown.. She wore a stunning, short, red A-line dress with a lace up open back.. Definitely not the typical style but she pulled it off beautifully.. That win was just yet another testament to her popularity at the school.. She won that by an all school vote including teachers and staff.. Only one time before, about 20 years earlier, a Junior had won that crown.. It was pretty much a given that the crown went to the Senior.. They did not just like her, they respected her.. She was kind to everyone and the crown on her head was proof of that.. I must say this about those Spokane cheerleaders at the time.. They weren't the snobs like so many others are.. It was a small enough school that they may have had their own clicks, but they had no problem mingling clicks.. Those high school years were the best years and the worst years of her life and mine.. Determined not to allow somebody to drag us down with them, we even found ourselves barefooted, in her car, not knowing where we would be sleeping that Sunday night.. We were homeless, by our own doings, and all we were sure of was that we had to take that stand that afternoon.. We knew we had family to help us figure out the next move.. Greatest leap of faith we could have taken.. We rented a place and were now living on our own.. I was babysitting and Steph was working two jobs, going to school, and cheerleading.. And, we were free from the oppression that had plagued us.. I remember the few years on Short Leaf fondly.. We really did love it there.. It seemed to be where the girls all hung out till all hours, doing their nails, coloring their hair, or just hanging out with no particular thing to do.. Her graduation time was interesting.. I figured I would be totally ok.. Then as I walked across the gym floor on parents night, to receive the flowers she was holding, waiting for me at the middle of the court, the tears burst loose.. So this was it.. This is what all of these years have been about and now it's almost over.. What an amazing young woman she is.. Motivated, driven, hardworking, and loving.. Don't get me wrong.. She'll tell you what's on her mind and she can make you want to run and hide when she's after you.. We used to call her the Warden.. She is Miss Organized.. She didn't get that from me.. Hahaha!! She loves to shop and should be on the Kohls commercials.. I watch them and have to laugh because I have literally watched her "score" on super sale nights, using her Kohls card to get Kohls cash.. She walked out one day with a $750 gazebo type tent with the screens that could be tied back or zipped to close off the whole thing.. Yep, she saw, she shopped, she scored!! Cost her $150.. We call her the spaz because she is.. Every year on the 1st of January we give her the title of "StressMaster" for that year.. Our lives would be very empty without her.. She too is one of my greatest accomplishments.. I am one of hers.. My daughters have defined me and I think they did a pretty good job..

Emily Melissa

Oh my, my... Where do I start?? My first born.. If we were lucky enough to finally produce a girl in the Dalton clan, her name was to be Emily Tiana.. Cathy Dalton made fun of me the whole time because all she could think of was TiajuanaBoomBoom.. Thanks Cat... Lol!!! And for a whole day, that was her name.. The only problem was she looked nothing like a Tiana.. She looked like a Melissa.. So, on the way out of the hospital, she officially became an Emily Melissa.. Missy is the name she would go by until she was about 23.. Anybody who knows her after that, knows her as Emily.. She's a Gemini.. Go figure.. She was such a beautiful baby.. And a good baby.. The one I made every mistake in the book with.. The one who at 13 months could name 13 colors.. Purple was "grape" though until she was about four.. At three she could smoke anybody at the "Name That Tune" game with the radio, except for me or her dad.. But she gave us a run for our money and if we weren't on our toes, she had us.. By three she also had the most beautiful long brown hair that cascaded all the way to her waist.. She was also a bit vain because I was still being stopped by people to comment on my pretty child.. As a baby it was impossible to get through the store without being stopped repeatedly by someone wanting to admire her.. She was a cutie-pie and she knew it.. Even cuter, at the time, was the fact that she talked with a lisp.. So when someone asked her her name, her reply would be, "Mithy Dahton" (Missy Dalton).. Didn't quite have the L's down yet either.. She loved to shop and would spend hours with her little plastic shopping cart, buying groceries out of our cabinets.. She loved playing dress-up and could spend hours at it.. She also hated clothes and it was a challenge keeping her dressed.. We managed to instill enough modesty in her, that by the time she was four, she stayed dressed only enough to get away with.. She would hunt easter eggs as many times as she could talk us into hiding them again.. She was reading by the time she started kindergarten.. Also became a princess that year when her and Aaron Blair won at the Bradleyville Carnival.. I think I baked almost 30 cakes for that crown.. One of which became the object of a food fight in our kitchen.. She wasn't too thrilled about wearing it until she saw it on everybody else.. Not sure which one of the boys started that.. We moved to Ozark her fourth grade year and I promised her we wouldn't make her change schools again.. We didn't.. Ozark is such a mix of wonderful and painful memories.. It was there that she thought she hated me for years because she had been programmed to believe I was a terrible person by someone she trusted.. This is the very same child, who once she got out on her own, realized that years had been wasted unnecessarily because of that.. I will never forget the late night call with her on the other end.. All she wanted to tell me was that she knew the truth by now, and how very, very, sorry she was for the time she had wasted staying out of my life.. I had waited patiently for years for that call.. I knew without a doubt that it would come.. It actually came several years before I expected it to, which was a Godsend for me.. She has been my biggest cheerleader since.. Don't get me wrong.. All three have been cheering me on.. Just all three are so different and the encouragement is quite different from them.. This is the same child, who at 30 still calls me mommy, and calls me immediately when she needs to just cry.. She is a #6 (Nurturing) Life Path number, and a Gemini (On the cusp of Cancer)/Sheep child.. If you want to know more, just look that up.. Fits pretty well.. She has my incessant fascination with numbers, the sky, and the world around her.. She only wants to be happy without hurting anyone else to be that way.. She cried when Snoopy's french girlfriend left him to go back to France.. Could not understand for the life of her, why that French Poodle would do that to Snoopy.. She caters too much to friends sometimes and forgets that family is waiting for her to cater to them a bit too.. She feels like she owes that to friends and knows that family will still be there when the friends aren't there anymore.. Wow.. Sounds so much like me when I was younger.. She wants to be loved for who she is and admired for what she has become.. She is much feistier about really stupid actions in people and is not nearly as willing to overlook things as I am.. Something I wish I could be more like sometimes.. It's odd that she is running the world and taking it by storm when she was the most 'fragile' of the girls.. The very child that would aggravate every boy in the neighborhood until they started dishing it back, then run home to get her little sister to go beat the crap out of them because they were being mean to her.. And sure enough, I looked out the kitchen window to see a whole pack of boys running up the hill, and right on their heels was Kim and her whiffle ball bat.. They were all afraid of Kim and Missy knew it.. She also exploited that regularly.. Missy was my accomplished instigator.. Her two little sisters playing quite well together seemed to drive her crazy.. So she would first convince them that she should play too because it would be so much more fun with three.. Oh yea, and we need to do it this way because that will be better too.. No no no!!! Their way was dumb!! They were just being brats and trying to get her in trouble with all the commotion.. She was just trying to help and make the game more fun and didn't know why they had to be such brats all the time.. It is pretty hilarious now, but at the time I just knew I would lose my mind.. I do not know how I survived those three.. Never, at any time during the raising of them, could I EVER leave them at home alone.. Not even when they were 16, 13, and 10.. Not even for a few minutes to run to the store.. A few attempts ended up with a 911 call, because the neighborhood boys found out they were alone and decided to have a little fun and scare them by beating on the basement portion of the house, and then run and hide.. Not even so much that, however, is the fact that the fighting among the three of them would begin before I even made it out of the driveway.. One of them would make it to the car before I pulled away complaining about their evil siblings and demanding that they had to go with me.. So I wound with all three in the car, fighting the entire time.. I have to be honest, the fighting didn't stop once Missy was out on her own, leading me to the realization that although I knew she was a pill in her own right, she had obviously been given much credit that wasn't hers to get.. Imagine that.. She is probably the "deepest" of my children.. She wants to get inside everything.. Music is not just for listening to.. It is to read the words too, and, make sense of why the song even exists and why it touches people the way it does.. I would GIVE untold wealth to have her sarcastic wit.. She is very, very, good, and delivers at the speed of light and sound.. You will know you have been zapped as soon as she opens her mouth.. It is so awesome to watch and listen to because she is not a mean person and does not prey on the "weak".. Unless they really, really, deserve it.. And, if she blasts them, they had it coming.. I steal a lot of her material to use on unwitting souls that need it.. Just putting her name in the "Title" space of this blog opened a floodgate of memories and I'm not sure I can ever do her justice with my words.. She is one of my greatest accomplishments, but even more importantly, I know I am hers.. I so totally love that.. I am a very blessed mommy.. :)

Prayers for Missy and Eric

by Susan Spicer Mason (Notes) on Tuesday, May 10, 2011 at 5:29pm

PublicFriendsOnly MeCustomClose FriendsFamilySee all lists...Wagoner, Oklahoma AreaBradleyvilleAcquaintancesGo Back

For all my prayer warriors.. This prayer request comes from a very sad place in my heart as I watch my child struggle.. Missy is my oldest child.. AKA Emily for those that met her after she started working in the banking industry ten years ago..  She will be 32 in June.. If you are a Facebook friend of mine you already know this.. I am also posting this request elsewhere so bear with me those of you that already know Missy and Eric.. Missy is married to the most amazing, gentle, loving, hilarious, ninja soul.. I could not have asked for a better husband for my child.. He is truly a gift from God.. They have recently discovered that having a child of their own will not happen without going the IVF route.. Issues from both of them will not allow that.. IVF is invitro fertilization in case you aren't familiar with that term.. Their dream is possible but this will be an exhausting road for them, emotionally and financially.. A road they are more than happy to take.. They have put God in charge and they know He is in control.. I've been wrestling with how to best explain their struggle to conceive this last year and then last week she posted a note on her page, in an FAQ format, to answer the bazillion questions she was being asked.. With her permission I am adding it to my note so I can get my prayer warriors busy.. She said everything so much more eloquently than I could have ever done.. They have no children and if this is God's will they know that will change.. We could be eagerly anticipating a new arrival/arrivals as soon as next spring.. MiMaw (me) wouldn't mind sharing a birthday with them at all!!! Not sure why I'm saying "them" but hey, how awesome would that be??? So, if I could get you to PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE add them to your prayer list, I can't begin to tell you how much it would mean for all of us.. Especially Eric and Missy (Emily)...

It's times like this I wish I had a PR rep! :)

by Emily Dalton Bentz on Thursday, May 5, 2011 at 3:19pm

Since saying the word “IVF” on my status update Tuesday, my inbox has been inundated with questions, comments, concerns, well wishes, and prayers. First, I would like to say thank you from the very bottom of my heart; Eric and I are so thankful for your prayers during this time. Second, the responsibility of answering each question/comment individually has almost made me break out in hives, so I’m going to try and answer everything here in a FAQ format. (Plus lists and bullet points make me feel like I’m in control, so this is really a win/win! LOL)

Q: Why are you talking about this publicly?

A: Why wouldn’t I? This is my personal space and I refuse to live in a cave and carry the secret of infertility. I will not bear the burden of shame regardless of the lies/attacks that the enemy has tried to use against us. I do not feel that infertility is a curse; rather an opportunity for God and His amazing glory to shine through this trial.

Q: Why not adoption?

A: Eric and I have looked into all of our options; adoption being one of them.  At this time, adoption is not an option for us.  What God has planned for our future?? We just have to wait and see! :)

.

Q: Have you tried (___________________________)?

A: YES! Most of them at least 3 times! HA

Please let me explain. I understand that I am just now talking about this, but Eric and I have been walking through this season for a while now. After lots of trials, tribulations, prayer, tears, and seeking God’s heart on the issue, we’ve watched Him open this door for us to have a baby of our own, through the process of IVF. We have so much outside encouragement and even concern, but this isn’t a process we started out of anything besides a God given desire to have a baby, and He has led us through this, He’s in control and we’re just following Him with surrendered hearts.

Q: Read this website, book, magazine; try this, talk to this person:

A: We have been advised by Godly counsel and medical professionals, that as we go through this, to be very cautious about weighing lots of opinions. It’s already been emotionally overwhelming, and I’m seeing what that wisdom was trying to prevent, so as we move forward, this is a three cord thing – me, Eric, and Jesus.

Again, I do appreciate your concern but Eric and I have made our decision and we would love your support and encouragement during this time. If this decision is not one that you feel you can support, then I ask please that you keep your comments to yourself. :)

I look forward to sharing with you, our family and friends, as we walk through this next season! We are so excited and so very honored that we get do experience life with so many incredible people!

Much love, Emily and Eric

Music....

It's really all about the lyrics.. The song says everything you ever wanted to say, yet could not seem to put into words.. I try to think of something really clever to say, or something truly inspirational, and all I get is a song running through my head.. Good enough for me I suppose.. I can't imagine my life without music.. It does it all.. Sometimes when you wish it wouldn't.. I do not want to be old and never listening to music anymore.. I hope I'm still be-bopping when I'm 90 and getting in trouble for playing it too loud.. I hope I'm still rockin out to Van Halen, blowing a speaker out of 70 yr old Missy's car and getting in A LOT of trouble for it.. Again.. I want to still be swooning to the Christmas music (year round), strumming my air guitar and beating on my air drums to country and rock, playing my air piano to everything, jammin to the old, old classics of Marty Robbins, Patsy Cline, Elvis, and the Beatles, just to name a few.. I hope I still run from the room screaming when I hear Opera!! And, I pray, really pray, that Gospel is a major part of my listening library.. Songs move me immensely, but there is no describing how a gospel song affects my soul.. I am awestruck by the way it stirs my heart and the inevitable sense of peace that comes from it.. If I lose my hearing, the music will play on in my mind.. Just my luck I'll get stuck on the all-time stupidest jingle ever!! Haha!! Oh please no... I am in awe of the fact that even though it seems as though everything that could ever be said, has already been said, yet somebody, somewhere, manages to say it in yet a whole new way, to a whole new tune.. Isn't God awesome?? His Grace is never ending and his blessings are many.. And music seems to say it all.. And yes, I am jealous.. I want to play and sing like that!! Guess I'll have to wait till I'm knocking on Heaven's door.. I was just kidding about the jealous part.. Well, the four year old in me wasn't!! Lol!! :)

Life on a different day and most likely a different planet.. :)

Life on a different day, and most likely, a different planet...
Current mood: blessed
As I read (for the umteenth time) my last blog, my heart smiles and my eyes cry... Those silly little fish... I suppose I will never forget them... Then I ponder the brand they left on my soul... Is it possible, however crazy this may sound, that I will always be affected by moments like that, because, 80% of my natal chart, is, water??? Many of my signs are ruled by Neptune... If you know me, then you know how detailed my charts are... Water, water, everywhere in mine... I grew up lost in a fantasy of being special and very unique... The type of person that you wouldn't forget once you met me... Then I start messing around with natal charts... Nothing unforgettable there.. (or so I thought)... I got caught up in the tidal wave of raising children, still searching for that something that really gave my life meaning and purpose... At some point I realize that my very existence was being defined by my girls... They gave my days a reason and rhyme... By now, I have done anyone's chart that will give me a birthdate... I keep going back to my own... The more I learn about people, the more I realize how very interesting my own chart is... 12th sign of both zodiacs... On the cusp of Aries(1st sign).. According to the ancient astrologers, I am a very, very, very old soul... Is that why I will tell you that I am "four years old", and mean it??? Am I really old enough to know that I don't ever have to be "five" if I don't want to?? My rising sign, and, my moon sign are both ruled by the moon... Yes, my moon sign is ruled by the moon... (Go figure) Is that why, to this day, I will break out in spontaneous howling (you know, wolves and the moon), especially, but not limited to, when there is a moon in the sky??? I actually think that the fact that I loved dog food as a little girl has something to do with that... (Disgusting, I know) Ask Kimberlee how often they have had to chase Emberlynn out of the doggie kibbles... And, dig them out of her mouth... (That's Mimaw's girl!!) Anyway, as I began to really dissect my own chart, and, do the same with my girls' charts, it seemed to be falling into place... There is nothing typical about anyones chart, but, by now, mine is absolutely amazing me... I really studied what it could mean to be me, and, I began to like what I was seeing... What I didn't like, I set about to alter... Oh heck yes, I am about as unique as they come... My children are definitely a chip off of Mommy's block, as are my grandbabies... They all have that wonderful sense of AWE about the world around them... Missy is my "oh-so-gentle" Sheep child, Kim, the feisty Rooster, will fight a buzz-saw running backward, and, Steph, my determined Ox, is as stubborn a child as can be... Steven loves the sky, and Emberlynn eats dog-food... (That was funny, so laugh, please.) You won't forget me easily... I amaze myself every day with how hilarious, ridiculous, and unpredictable, I can be... I don't know where it comes from... (I have yet to figure out how many Me's there really are.) I am, without a doubt, a contradiction to everything that I am... I am the most predictably unpredictable person I have ever met... Yet, if you know me, really know me, you will be able to call my next move every time... Ask my kids... I laugh harder at myself than anyone else does, and, once I get started, you will laugh too... My heart breaks for no particular reason... I do feel the worlds pain... I used to think it was a curse of sorts... I now know it is an amazing blessing, and, I hope I never lose that... With all of the above being said, (Ha! You thought I was off chasing chickens again, didn't you??), I will get back to the fishes... The little friends I can not forget... Maybe, just maybe, I was once a little mermaid, and because of that I am so at home in the water... I am equally terrified of it... Either way, I am greatly affected by it... As a first time scuba diver with the Magruders, I used less air than anyone else... Very unusual I was told... I guess calming your breathing down is usually a learned effort... I was instantly relaxed...  My cruise was unforgettable... The fishes, I don't really get it yet... It was the most amazing high, being surrounded by them... To see them looking at me looking at them... This is all very repetitive, I know, but it was such an unbelievable moment in time... It was such an unbelievable moment in time.... Thank you God... Thank you... For my life... For all of the blessings in my life... Even the ones that brought great pain... They brought me to this wonderful place... WOW.... Just, WOW...

The cruise

October 4, 2008 - Saturday

Life as I see it....
Current mood: content
So, I have always been terrified at the thought of a cruise... Me?? On a big 'ol teeny tiny ship, on a ridiculously huge ocean??? I think not... Then, I put that fear aside to try it with Missy and five other women... This was Missy's first cruise also... We both had a complete meltdown trying to get through security and to our cabin... A real life Xanax to the rescue moment... (I have had Xanax like 4 times in my whole life!) All I can say about facing my fears and going for it, is, THANK GOD I did!!! It was an AMAZING trip... Three days in the Bahamas was not enough... I felt like I was having a "Finding Nemo" moment while snorkling at CocoCay with her and Jennifer... I looked around only to find myself surrounded by hundreds of fish, just swimming along with me, going where I went... When I would stop, they would start swimming around me, literally brushing up against me, as if to say, "Well? Why aren't you swimming?" Put my face back in the water, and all was right with the world again, with my little buddies going where I went... I know that seems like such a very, very, small thing to be affected by, but it did, and I was... For just a moment, I became an honored guest among them, in their world... Being trailed by a Sting-Ray did not even frighten me... It too, was just along for the swim... To actually look them in the eyes, and make eye contact, knowing they were looking me in the eyes, was incredibly spiritual... I felt like I was face to face with my God... Like I had just received this amazing glimpse of life, that, I was up to that point, unaware of... Like I was being reminded, life is just too short, so get out there and swim, if only for just a moment... What a gift... My life, my loved ones, my earth... I will be (yet again) forever changed by such a simple experience... It is not the first time, nor will it be the last, that this has happened to me... My blessings are infinite, as is my love for the people and things, that make life one worth living... It might all fall apart tomorrow... My darkest hours may be only a heartbeat away... But you know what??? This HAS all been such a life WORTH living, surrounded by people that love me... By people that I love passionately... We're in this together, even if we have no particular direction to be going... It's important to just hang out and feel all of the blessings that some of the smallest events in our world are capable of bestowing on us... These are the things we may have to hang on to when our hearts are broken and pain dictates our day... The blessings that, may just be, my "Peek over the Pail" when I don't have the heart to pull myself up... I learned all of this one afternoon... I learned all of this from a bunch of little fishes... WOW... I learned ALL of this from a bunch of little fishes... Fishes that welcomed me with no strings attached... Fishes that made me feel like an honored guest in their world... Thank you little buddies of mine... God willing, we will swim again someday...